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Wednesday, 29 February 2012

Some FemSoc thoughts: Valentine’s and Leap year's day.

“According to Queen Margaret of Scotland's 13th Century law, women are allowed to propose to men ONLY on the 29th February (Leap Year Day)............and if the man refuses, they are owed one dress by the Queen............................I'm not above exploiting such antiquated displays of ancient sexism...tell the Queen Lizzy to meet me at Vera Wang posthaste.”

"I do not, and do not intend to observe Valentine's Day rituals. Valentine's Day is a festival celebrating the heteronormative construction of the relationship. This institutionalised way of relating is something which as feminists, and people who should be fighting for the equality and appreciation of all genders, should not be supporting. I also feel that the overvaluation of the relationship damages and limits all of our relationships, both those that may and may not, by other people, be regarded as an example of the relationship.

I agree with ze frank in this video - - to express a certain construction of love on Valentine's Day means less, because it's what you're expected to do. For similar reasons, I do not support the idea of a special occassion for leap years as one's where women could traditionally propose. Not only does this mean less in terms of the expression of a certain construction of love, but it also means less for the cause of liberation. A liberated person of any gender should be able to propose at any time of year, but also should not feel pressured to conform to the idea of marriage, so moulded by the heterosexist discourse which shapes the relationship."

“I suppose Valentines day has it ups and it downs. Surely, spending time with a loved one should be emphasised more than once a year, so much more that it doesn't need an actual day. And the chip and pin element can be irritating but seriously, nobody is forcing anyone to buy into it. However I must say I actually find the present buying/making part as exciting as well as stressful, because it makes me question how well I know him.
I intended to make sure that my other half knew that he didn’t have to bend to sexist conventions, but he surprised me and made a huge effort any way, so much more effort than I did. What do you do as a feminist? When he offers to pay, you want to split, he refuses and you don’t want to argue over this... its all just a bit silly... Who makes these rules?
And this leap year stuff? It reminds me of when I was younger and when people used to ask, “ So, do you think a girl can ask out a boy?”, I replied with “Yes, why not?”. I don't think I ever have but I think its only because I have the same fears of rejection, not because of my gender. A woman proposing shouldn't be strange, and seriously hun... letting me split the bill will make me happy. ITS THE 21ST CENTURY come on equal partnership!”

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